Thank you to DeAnna (talking about her optimistic former husband) for the conversation which inspired this one:

Ladies, never say to a man “I would never have sex with you, ever, no matter what”. Because men just don’t believe you when you say that… they think you are either lying or that you are fooling yourself, and that in actuality you have some other feelings for them that you *must* be suppressing.

A woman can say “I would never have sex with that man, even if he were the last man left on Earth”. But a man, saying something similar, would be aware that he was either angry or just joking, or not particularly horny/drunk in that moment. This is when women think “Why doesn’t he get it??? I just have no interest in him?”

You see, men don’t go around thinking “I would never have sex with that woman”. Maybe in a fit of anger they might think that… but deep-down they know it isn’t true, and they apply the same logic to you. When you say “I’ll never have sex with you” we hear, “She’s confused about just when and where she really wants to have sex with me… she doesn’t quite know where I fit in, but obviously, given the fact she raised the issue, it must be something she’s thinking about, so therefore there’s still a chance!”

Men think not in terms of yes/no with having sex with women, they think in terms of “when” or in which priority. There are some women we’d only do if they were the last of maybe 1000 women left on Earth; but there is no woman, even if she were the last woman on Earth, into whom we wouldn’t gladly insert our penis. Conversely, there might be a woman with whom we would clearly rather have sex, even if we could have sex with any other woman anywhere besides her.

“Have sex have sex have sex” I really get tired of typing this phrase and hearing it in my head. But, on the other hand, there are too many euphamisms lacking beauty or clarity.

“Global Warming”, on the other hand, sounds better the more I say it. Isn’t that ironic?

– Chad